The 'Exciting' Future of Domestic T20 Cricket

It was a lovely morning when the president of the ICC woke up from a morning slumber greeted with a warm cup of mocha, and a personal letter outlining yet another amazingly successful T20 competition. This letter was from his Technical Advisor of Cricketing Innovations, the mastermind behind the IPL concept, super-subs and overseas cheerleaders.

It raised very real concerns about the future of our beloved T20 sport...

As successful as this newest, dominant brand of cricket is, we as innovators must continue to be one step ahead of the game and the fans, and ensure that we secure the future of our exciting brand. The gradual takeover of ODI and Test cricket is all but sealed, but our job is not done, our game needs more pop, more zing and more buzz, and here how we are going to do it:

One League to Rule Them All!
We combine the IPL, SLPL, BPL, BBL, EAPL, C20, A20 and HRV... and create what I call the "League of Leagues"... or "LOL" if you will. This will be a bi-annual six month event (see what I did there!) featuring ten teams from each league in a league of its own, producing a league table topper or 'league champion' for the league as well as 'league runner up' from each league.

These two teams from each league will form the LOL Champions League. It will feature a round robin which will produce a 'super league champion' before running into the playoffs section featuring the top 8 teams called the 'gold team league play-offs'. All (yes all) the remaining loser teams will be divided into 'silver team league play-offs' and 'wooden team league play-offs' to ensure nobody feels left out, and we will have three LOL champions every year and these three will play each other in a winner take all to unveil the 'platinum super league champion'.

More Exciting Teams!
Each team will forcibly consist of 4 local superstars, one of which will be the 'icon' player (obviously the most famous guy) who will also be the captain by default and he can never ever leave his team, ever. One of these five local superstars must be over 40, and one must be under 15. The rest of the team will be made up of 3 overseas superstars, 1 american baseball player, 1 Bollywood celebrity, 1 lucky lucky winner of the weekly LOL draw and 1 cheerleader.  The point is that we reach all possible target audiences.

Also, every team has a designated 'traitor' who can switch sides with the other 'traitor' at any stage of any game. This will really spice up the contest and in particular freshen up existing rivalries and create new ones in the process. For the first time we have the very real possibility of a superstar smashing a century to beat his first century!

More Runs!
We want more big hits, and there is an alarming number of sub 200 scores and lack of centuries in the current game. The situation is simply unacceptable, so I propose:

• Free hits are an underarm lob that must not bounce on the pitch at all. These can happen in the event of a front foot no ball, a back foot no ball, a left foot no ball, wides, byes, leg byes, bye byes, causing the batsman to miss the ball completely, and bowling over 140kph.
• A batsman missing the ball or scoring zero runs penalizes the batting team 2 runs.
• If the ball is hit in the air for longer than four seconds, it is automatically a six and he cannot be out caught. Each stadium will have a huge 'shot clock' to time these.
• Two fielders during power play overs, period.

More Drama!
A tied match will now feature a dance-off between the two bollywood celebrities of each team. Their performances will be ranked by the live audience who will each be given a key pad to cast their votes. The results will be updated on the big screen in *real time*.

© AFP

There will be 24x7 footage in the player dressing rooms as well as microphones to ensure we really get behind the scenes. Each week will also feature a 'spotlight player' who will be followed around all week to really get into the lifestyle and what it means to be a cricket superstar. We are also talking about weekly DVDs for fans to forever cherish their favourite off-the-field moments.

There will be an opening ceremony, a closing ceremony, a mid season street parade and fortnightly match parties. I have already talked to the local councils regarding the parades and they are already expressing their interest!

***

These are just some of the MANY ideas my committee of fifty have short listed, and believe me there will be more to come. Our strength as you know is our ability to innovate with edgy, crisp and new-age concepts. I look forward to hearing your feedback and can't wait to execute our new plans.


Having finished the letter and the mocha, the president of the ICC could only reflect upon the amazing talents at his disposal, he thought the game of cricket had seen it all and yet there is just so much untapped potential.

He can take comfort in knowing the future of cricket is in safe hands.

International T20 is the only good T20

Regular readers of this blog will know by now some of my pet peeves:

• Cricket cheerleaders 
• MS Dhoni batting promotions
• The Shahid Afridi wicket celebration
• And above all, Twenty20 cricket overkill

However the recently concluded International T20 World Cup changed my mind about one thing. There is such thing as quality, watchable Twenty20 cricket and this quality only comes from one stage, the international stage. 

Therefore my hate has been redirected now purely to domestic Twenty20 cricket, which really is nothing more than the much described batting circus. The recent World Cup had one key ingredient that the IPL and its various simpleton cousins do not have, top class players participating in actual teams.

Finally we get to see batsmen playing proper strokes built on technique and skill instead of swinging madly like a wood cutter on steroids. Finally we saw bowlers being able to contain them instead of serving up a volley of garbage. And most importantly, finally we saw teams playing for national pride rather than a meaningless mishmash team of licorice all-sorts.

This wasn't the IPL, this was real cricket.

 Wait... who are you guys again? © Assc Press

I say "World Cup" loosely though, as it is still a level below the true 50-over format equivalent. Other than the memorable inaugural tournament, the other installments came and went too quickly with administrators unable to rein themselves, looking to quickly mass produce the newly discovered candy. It is difficult to remember much of those later tournaments bar one or two matches (Chris Gayle vs Brett Lee anyone?).

This tournament on the other hand was different. Bar a certain Mr. Pietersen, every team turned up full strength and lined up on a largely even keel. And the results were fantastic.

We need to see more of this, and much less of the domestic nonsense. We have the IPL, the BPL, SLPL, KFC Big Bash, HRV Cup... heck even Canada and Kenya have their own little backyard T20 romp.

That's not even mentioning the pretentiously named Champions League T20, a sorry attempt to ape the football equivalent. The drop in quality between last month's tournament and this silly one is quite remarkable.

In a Nutshell Then...

• International T20 is great.
• Everything else is not.
• Stop it.

Australian Cricket, The Romance Is Over

This is it.

The pits, the crypt, the absolute bottom of the barrel. Since their ridiculously efficient 2007 world cup victory, Australia cricket slipped slowly as their champion team started to age while all warning signs were ignored. The ultimatum is now with us.

Here in 2011 it surely cannot get any worse than this. This, a loss to the New Zealand test team, and in Australian territory. Look back in recent history and forget the Ashes collapse, the world cup loss, even the dreadful 47 all out... one certainty was that the Kiwis *always* lose to Australia in test cricket. 18 years since any loss to them, 25 years on Australian soil.

Ok boys, your best fake smile now.  © AFP

To lose to what is mostly a sorry New Zealand line-up means it is official, that the romance is over. Australian cricket is dead. You would even feel inclined to sympathise with them, if they hadn't piled on the misery for so many years. Its laughable now to hear these one-eyed commentators attempt to immortalize the likes of Phillip Hughes.

It was predictable in many ways, they had an embarrassment of riches and created an egotistic bubble and a winning culture that made them seemingly invincible. They were the team that everyone loved to hate, the only ones allowed to make stupid series predictions and single out batsmen as targets while the rest of us lived in the fear that they were probably right. The resulting aura meant that most opposition wilted at the very sight of their line-up.

They had the right to talk it up, and that right is gone. There is no aura left and they are being exposed brutally for what they are, eleven mere mortals. Lets take a moment to compare the old Australia to these ho-hums...

1) Matthew Hayden vs Phil Hughes - A batting butcher who would swing his meat cleaver and carve up any attack resembling weakness. Hughes is Chris Martin's bunny, enough said.
2) Justin Langer vs David Warner - The silent accumulator who never gave you an inch and played out his innings with nothing but patience. Warner is a Twenty 20 cricketer, and his daft handling of the tail help cost Australia the New Zealand match.
3) Ricky Ponting (young) vs Usman Khawaja - Would come in and happily smack around any loose bowling at a great strike rate. It was all so natural for Ponting, who has been replaced by a Chanderpaul like character. Khawaja has fight but will quickly disappear unless he starts producing.
4) Damien Martyn vs Ricky Ponting (geriatric) - Martyn was the definition of a touch player, a subtle batting technique built on precision timing and a hearty slice of Mark Waugh like cockiness. The current Ponting is built on reputation alone, and never ceases to look rusty.
5) Michael Clarke vs Captain Michael Clarke - A young buck who used to go out there and make batting look easy given he had the perfect batting order around him. He is currently their best batsman, but he is no captain. Australia badly need a skipper who gives slackers a smart kick up the rear.
6) Michael Hussey vs Michael Hussey - The law of averages is inevitable. Hussey was no Bradman but he was responsible for a lot of rescue acts. Too bad that he has smacked harsh realities given his real moment of need.
7) Adam Gilchrist vs Brad Haddin - Any advantage that a bowling team had got blown away by the man who redefined lower order counter attacks. As an able wicket-keeper he was essentially two players. Haddin's idiotic shot selection needs to stop being defended with the Sehwag inspired comment "that's how he plays". Sehwag makes runs, there is a difference.
8-11) Warne/Gillespie/Lee/McGrath vs ???- That bowling quartet ensured that there was constant pressure at every angle. You had the full works, pace, bounce, accuracy and quality spin. In the current crop, not a single player would have even made Australia A of the 00's. Peter Siddle shows that Australian spirit but nothing more, while Mitchell Johnson has invented himself as the bowling equivalent of Ashraful.

Australia clearly forgot about the next generation, and a team with enough depth to fill three squads suddenly can't even find eleven players worth mentioning. What happened?

1. The IPL, and hence the ugly love child the KFC Big Bash. Its a strange mix of dodgy shots and Rugby League commentary.
2. The overcooked swansong finishes. While the endless praise and tributes went on and on, did anyone stop to promote the next generation?
3. The never ending finishes. Ricky, you are done... stop embarrassing yourself.
4. The crazy axe. You got away with sending Bevan and Hodge on their way, but to drop Simon Katich was unforgivable.

Somebody fire my script writer.  © Getty Images

And so Australia now has a generation wide gap to fill, and the current source is the horrid T20 format. At this rate the Indians should arrive here and walk away laughing, especially if there is a fit Zaheer Khan available.

The recovery road for Australia cricket will not be easy. Heck it might even be West Indian.



Related Reading:
The South Africa Collapse
The Angry Ricky Ponting